Ok, don't laugh. Remember the Chia Pet? The one Hal Sparks, the entire cast of VH-1's I Love the 80's, and most of America (myself included) made fun of? Ch-Ch-Ch-Chia!
Well then, you're gonna love this. It turns out that Salvia Hispanica, a.k.a. Chia seed, is the new thing...to chow down upon. It's all the rage. It IS the new wheat grass. And a nutritional supplement with which I am now obsessed.
It all started when I saw a friend mixing up these itty bitty seeds in her Crystal Light. Of course, if it's not chocolate or shaped like a chicken nugget, I'm not interested. And Crystal Light...gack! But if I was going to make fun at full velocity, I needed talking points. I picked up the container. The label described its contents as "premium Chia nutrition," with the benefits of "increased and sustained energy, controlled food cravings, better digestive health (you know what that means), increased hydration, and much more."
Hmmm, I wasn't sure about the much more part. If it isn't going to prepare my taxes, spare me. But I could use some sustained energy. Or any energy at all. Currently, I'm ready to take a nap right after my 7:00 a.m. shower. And controlled food cravings? If it will curb my desire to eat everything on Aisle 5 of my grocery store, that would be awesome! And these tiny little seeds claim to be concentrated in omega-3 fatty acids, protein and fiber. Well, those are magic words in the health and fitness industry. It's the equivalent of saying "discount wedding gowns" to the Running of the Brides at Filene's Basement's Bridal Gown Sale.
So I try it...one tablespoon of Chia mixed with eight ounces of Simply Grapefruit juice. Mixed and soaked for 30 minutes, it looks like a poppyseed muffin. And wow, it tastes just like grapefruit juice! Or, if I mix it with orange juice...orange juice. I see...it's like a chameleon girlfriend.
A couple of days later, I'm running faster (To the theme from Rocky on loop. Yo Adrian), jumping higher, and my pipes haven't been this clean since the Romanian high colonic incident of 2007. I am in love.
I can still hear my grandmother telling me if I swallowed a lemon seed, a lemon tree would grow inside my stomach. I never ate lemons again. (This was the same woman who told me eating raw cookie dough would give me worms.) Worst case scenario is I'm growing a Chia Puppy inside my tummy as we speak. Or it's going to be like the episode of Star Trek when Captain Picard is taken over by the Borg. Except it will be half Elizabeth/half maniacal Chia Pet. If that happens, come get me!